You know how people can recall any year when referring to a certain situation?
Like, remember when Lucy broke her arm? It was 1974, and I got my first car....
Or, It was 1967 and we took our first vacation to the Grand Canyon.
Not me. It's impressive that I remember the year of my birth.
I think that it's because my mind doesn't see things in black and white.
More like colors and shapes.
All of that changed in 2013.
What I experienced with my brother's passing was very black and white.
The phone call.
The conversation with my dad.
The flight home.
It plays through my mind like a broken record, which surprisingly hasn't stopped playing.
Dont' get my wrong. There were incredible moments in 2013, too.
I was awarded Top 40 Under 40 in Memphis.
I ran like a champ 7 months into my pregnancy.
I birthed a baby the exact way that I wanted to.
I watched my toddler bloom into an incredibly imaginative boy.
All of these are noteworthy,
but chances are I won't remember that they happened in 2013.
(And don't think that my child's birth counts - I mix up Gray's birth year AND day all the time. Not kidding.)
My personality is fueled with optimism, and I know it will get it back.
2014 is going to be my year.
A year dedicated to the betterment of the lives around me, which will in turn better my own.
2014 will be a year of dedication.
I'm not sure how or why I haven't been able to fundraise quite like I did two years ago, but I will dedicate myself to finding the remedy. Disability awareness is so important to me, and I'll see to it that people become aware and join me.
2014 will be a year of motivation.
I can't think of any more motivating event than that of training for a marathon. The amount of people who have called my running an inspiration to begin themselves is overwhelming.
I love it and hope I can reach more people.
2014 will be a year of loving.
Is there anything more contagious?
2014 will be a year of celebrating my brother's life, and not mourning it.
Each mile I run will absolutely involve thinking about him and the life he lived. But from now on, the focus will be how I can take the lessons I learned from him on strength and persistence and pass them onto others.
Yes, 2014 will be a good year.
(I promise it will make you feel like a million bucks.)